Emily's Hidden Terror

By LJ Kundanaji

Based the original idea of Sunshine Lukundo.

Emily's story is actually a construction based on Sunshine's idea. She showed me her incomplete manuscript and I fell in love with the idea.I decided to write my own version.

Emily’s walk was unsteady as she entered the school gate. She thoroughly rubbed her eyes and her temples to remove any tear marks. There were a lot of thoughts on her mind, thoughts which she wished she could throw away, but they kept haunting her perpetually. Indeed they had become a part of her.

She stared at the other kids as they played merrily; a large crowd of happy kids. Somehow she just felt as if she did not belong, as though she was an alien from another planet. She sat on the low stone wall that overlooked the playground, supporting her head with both her hands. Oh how she wished that she could join the other kids and play along with them. Yet, there was this voice in her head that kept saying; “They won’t like you, Emily. No one can ever like you.”

The bell rang buzzed noisily, jolting her out of her thoughts. She slowly picked up her bag and hang it on her shoulders, seemingly with a lot of effort. She was nearly knocked off her feet by the other kids as they rushed to line up at the assembly point which happened to be an unused netball court. Sluggishly she joined the other girls of her class. They were rowdy and excited. She found herself being tossed back and forth. She did not care though. She was used to it. She often felt she was a punching bag waiting to be punched by every Jim and Jack.

“Silence!” Mr. Chiti, the principle screamed. There was a hush. Every one stared at him with fear. But Emily was the most afraid. She tried to hide behind Mary, who happened to be taller and was conveniently standing in front of her. However she had no need to.

“March to your classrooms very quietly; all of you!” He commanded.

Emily’s teacher, Mrs. Chonia, searched for her register as the pupils walked into the classroom, noisy as usual. After a few minutes they had all settled down in their various positions. She took a quick glance around and instinctively knew that they were all present. They were all like her children and she knew them all. Really, it was not necessary to call out the register; but it helped her to ascertain what mood each of them was in. If some of them had woken up on the wrongside of the bed, so to speak, she would know.

She called out their names one by one. Most of them answered enthusiastically, except Jim who was usually shy and Emily, who had obviously woken up on the wrong side of her bed because when she called out her name, she did not answer. Mrs. Chonia looked up from her seat and a worried look spread across her face. Emily had a gloomy countenance. She was gazing at her desk with a dreamy expression, her palm against her cheek. She was scratching the desk carefully with her finger, as if etching a drawing.

“Emily!” she called, a bit louder than at first. The little girl started and stared back at her with round fearfully eyes.

“Pardon?” she said in a shaky voice. Her classmates roared with laughter.

“Quite please!” she ordered. The class became dead quiet. “Emily, I am calling out the register. You did not answer. Where is your mind?”

“I am sorry, Mrs. Chonia,” she said apologetically, “I did not hear you.”

“It’s alright dear,” she said. She always very considerate. She smiled reassuringly at the frightened little girl. The friendly smile seemed to make her feel better. She managed to smile back at her weakly.

Mrs. Chonia was very understanding. Emily was naturally shy and apprehensive. A little absentmindedness was not completely out of order. She remembered her child hood days and smiled to herself. She gave Emily a nod of approval.

As the day progressed however, Mrs. Chonia realized that Emily was experiencing more than the usual blues. She was quieter than usual and kept glancing out of the window. Her mind was adrift in a sea of thought. She did not even participate in any of the class discussions. Usually she would pay attention, her eyes burning with enthusiasm and curiosity. If she knew the answer to a question, her hand would shoot right up even before she finished asking the question. Yet today, her voracity was mysteriously missing. On several occasions, she was tempted to jolt her to pay attention by calling out her name, but she knew better than to do that.

When break time came and the children noisily streaked out class with their lunch boxes, Mrs. Chonia felt the urge to rush to the staff-room for her coffee break. But she restrained herself when she realized that it was not okay for her as a teacher to be rushing. She grinned to herself.

The consequences of being around children all the time! As she arranged her desk she caught sight of Emily from the corner of her eyes. She was literally dragging herself to the door. All the others had left and she was the only one left. She seemed to be lonesome. In a flash, Mrs. Chonia was kneeling beside her, staring empathetically into her face.

“Are you okay dear?” she asked.

“Yes,” she replied hesitantly.

Why are you not with your friends?” She shrugged but said nothing.

“Did you get into a fight dear?” she was now even more dismayed. “Did Mary do anything to you?”

She shook her head, all the while staring at the floor to avoid her gaze.

“Okay…go join your friends.” She said standing up and sighing. She watched her walk away and shook her head. Something was amiss.

Emily walked to the low brick wall just outside her classroom where the rest were seated, noisily chatting away as they munched their food. She sat down on the wall alone and away from them.

Euphemia and Annie, who happened to be her closest friends, were puzzled by her strange behaviour. She usually sat next to them when they ate, but today, she did not even greet them.

“Let me talk to her,” Euphemia said getting up and brushing off the bread crumbs from her dress. She skipped towards Emily with a big smile.

“Emily! My mom has baked a delicious cake for me. Do you want to have a bite?” she invited. Emily looked up at her with a slight smile.

“Yes,” she said.

“Come,” she grabbed her by the hand, yanking her to her feet. She had to hold on to her lunch box to prevent it from falling to the ground.

“My mom also baked me some nice scones,” Emily said, her eyes beginning to glow with pride, as they walked towards Annie who was smiling broadly at them.

Before long, the three of them were chatting away happily. And for a while, Emily’s melancholy vanished. Mrs. Chonia was watching from the window. She breathed a sigh of relief. It seemed she was coming to. Whatever was causing her to feel low was obviously not severe.

* * *

Mrs. Chonia had her eye on Emily for the rest of the day. Though she seemed to be coming to, a dark and mysterious cloud was still looming over her. She was drifting in and out of her melancholy.

After classes were over, Mrs. Chonia dismissed her pupils with a weary voice. It had been a long day.

“Don’t forget to do your homework!” she shouted above the noise; but they hardly heard her. As they ran out of the room, almost at the same time, Mrs. Chonia gently pulled Emily back.

“I need to talk to you, dear,” she said. The little girl stared back at her with frightened eyes. She smiled reassuringly to pacify her.

“Don’t worry, you have done nothing wrong.” Emily tried hard to believe her but her heart was racing. Never had Mrs. Chonia asked to talk to her! Maybe she knew! She shuddered at the thought.

“Escort me to the principles office first,” she said holding her by one hand. In the other hand were some files. Emily was now freaking out. The principle himself! Things were more serious than she thought! She was literally shivering as Mrs. Chonia knocked on the Principle’s office.

“Come in!” came the principle’s big voice. Before she could open the door, she felt a tug on her hand. She looked down and saw the look of horror on the little girl’s face. She quickly knelt down and stared into her face pleadingly.

“You have not done anything wrong,” she said almost desperately. “I just want to give Mr. Chiti these files. Stay here, I won’t take long.”

She pointed to the bench just outside the office. Emily sat down reluctantly.

“Good now, I won’t take long.” She promised. She opened the door, walked in and shut it slowly behind her.

As she sat there on the bench alone, Emily felt a bit relaxed. Her mind began to wonder. She thought of her mom and suddenly yearned to be with her and tell her everything that was weighing on her mind. She thought of her dad and she shuddered slightly. She loved her dad, but she did not want to get him angry. She knew what he was capable of doing when annoyed. She thought of her one and only brother and her heart sank. She could clearly remember the angry look on his face. She tried hard to shut it out but it kept coming back…

“Emily dear, we can go now,” Mrs. Chonia’s voice came from above interrupting her thoughts. She held out her hand and Emily grasped it reluctantly, all the while staring at her with round fearful eyes. She gingerly pulled her up to her feet.

“Don’t worry,” she said with a warm smile that reminded her of her mother. “I will drive you home so that your parents don’t get worried.”

“Thank you, madam,” she said slightly relieved. The walk home was quite long and lonely.

“Emily, I want to find out something,” Mrs. Chonia asked as they drove out of school with Emily securely strapped in the front seat with a seat-belt.

“You don’t spend much time with your friends Euphemia and Annie,” she began, trying to sound as friendly as possible, “what happened? Did they do anything bad to you?”

She shifted uneasily in her seat. She stole nervous glances at her teacher, who was staring straight ahead at the road. It seemed she really needed answers. She opened her mouth but no sound came out of her throat. Her body went limp. How could she tell her teacher that there was no real reason? How could she tell her that she did not just want to be with anyone? Indeed, how could she tell her that she just wanted to be alone?

“No, they did not do anything wrong,” she said hesitantly.

“Then why do you not spend time with them like you used to?”

“I don’t know.”

A look of amusement and surprise spread across her face. Emily wished the seat could swallow her. She looked outside and watched the trees rushing past. She gazed at the white clouds in the blue sky. They looked like big fluffy wools of cotton floating in the air. She imagined herself running and playing on them, high up in the sky where no one could find her nor get her.

“You must tell me what is wrong, Emily,” Mrs. Chonia was saying, “I want to help.” But Emily did not hear her. She was too engrossed with thoughts of being on the clouds. She was jolted out of her thoughts when the car came to an abrupt stop. She was thrown forward by the seat and then back again by the seat belt. She stared at her teacher with a questioning look.

“Sorry,” she said, “I almost passed your place.” She put the car in reverse gear and slowly manoeuvred the car in front the gate. Emily slipped out of the car and slammed the door shut. Mrs. Chonia started at the sound. She waved at Emily before she pushed open the heavy black gate and slipped inside. Mrs. Chonia drove away with more questions than answers.

* * *

The days that followed were full of surprises for Mrs. Chonia. Emily quickly got out of her melancholy and literally reverted to her former self. She was now happy and what was more, she was now spending more time with Annie and Euphemia.

It was break time and Emily was having fun with her two friends.

“What do you fear most?” Annie asked. The other two girls shuddered from excitement.

Euphemia wriggled her fingers and put on a frown.

“Spider! Big scary spiders!” she in a trembling voice; trying to sound scary. They all laughed,rather nervously.

“As for me,” Annie said, “I am afraid of snakes. Ssssss!”

She hissed like a snake and made slithering movements with her hands.

“What about you Emily,” Euphemia asked, “What frightens you the most?”

All eyes were now on her. She did not need to think hard. Her eyes widened with fear and apprehension as she stared back at her friends. As she looked on, they gradually vanished and all she could see was her brother’s face, contorted with anger. She vigorously shook her head as she tried hard to remove the terrible memories from her head. When she came to, her friends were staring at her with gaping faces full of questions.

“Emily, what is the matter?” Euphemia was asking.

Emily stared back at them fearfully. She suddenly felt a strong urge to cry. Emotions were inflating her like air filling a balloon. She felt as if she was going to burst if she stayed there any longer. She stood up sharply, trying very hard to stop the tears that were welling up behind her eyelids. Everything around grew hazy and she felt hot tears drop onto her arm as she tried to wipe her nose. Simultaneously, she felt a terribly big lump in her throat. She could not take it any more. With tremendous amount of effort, she rushed inside and ran towards the girl’s room. She got into one of the toilets and frantically locked the door behind her. She collapsed in a heap in one corner and with her head buried in her arms, she cried like she had never done before. All she wanted was to vanish from this world so cruel…

* * *

Emily woke up with a start. She did not know how long she had sat in the corner with her chin resting on her knees and her arms wrapped around her legs. Some thing had woken her up, but she was not sure what it was. She nearly stopped breathing as she listened.

“Emily dear, are you okay?” came a voice. It was Mrs. Chonia! It was her that had woken her up. She froze, not wanting to move at all.

“Emily, can you hear me?” she called again, “It’s okay dear, no one is going to hurt you. Please open the door.”

She wondered for a while what she was going to do. Mrs. Chonia’s voice somehow sounded like that of her mother. She suddenly yearned for her. At that moment, all that she wanted was to be in her arms because she felt that she could be safe there. She hastily stood up and rushed to the door. With shaky hands she quickly opened it and virtually threw herself into Mrs. Chonia’s outstretched arms. Her three closest friends were looking on with anxious expressions on their faces. Emily shuddered as she sobbed in Mrs. Chonia’s arms.

“Everything will be alright dear,” she said softly, stroking her hair, “no one is going to hurt you.”

“I don’t want to see him again…” she said suddenly in between sobs. Mrs. Chonia’s hair stood on end. She froze for a while. A déjà vu feeling came over her.

“Who, dear? Who don’t you want to see?” she asked with a sickening dread.

“I don’t want to see my brother again.” She looked up into her teacher’s face pleadingly.“Please…”

Mrs. Chonia’s heart beat faster as she stared at the pleading girl’s face. She suddenly was overwhelmed with emotions and she just had to fight hard to hold back the tears or else she would have burst out crying.

“Come with me dear,” she said pulling her away from the crowd of girls that was now forming. She knew just where to take her. Mrs. Chonia gently lifted her up and carried her in her arms as if she was a very precious parcel. Emily felt rather uncomfortable because she perceived herself a big girl. But she could not resist this kind of treatment. She was powerless to do so. In fact, it made her feel safer. She, however, tried hard to avoid looking at her classmates who were following behind with rather envious stares and chattering excitedly.

Mrs. Chonia suddenly came to a halt and turned to face the crowd of excited pupils. The expression on her face showed that she did not really know what to do with them. She frowned slightly.

“Boys and girls,” she began slowly, “there is no more class for today. You can go and play. I will call you when I need you.”

They almost went into a frenzy of excitement.

“Alright!” the boys cried, “let’s go play soccer!”

“Let’s go play netball!” the girls screamed. They all rushed along the corridor ahead of them to the outside. This did not please Mrs. Chonia very much, but she would do anything to be with alone Emily. This was a very fragile moment and she did not want anything to spoil it. She smiled down warmly at the little girl in her arms. To her joy, she reciprocated, her wet eyes glittering. Mrs. Chonia shuddered from emotion. Her own eyes flooded with tears. At that moment, she suddenly remembered how it felt to hold her own little girl; a little girl who had been snatched away from her arms by death’s long and cruel arms.

“I love you Emily,” she found herself saying without realizing it. She kissed her on the forehead.A warm sensation spread through her whole body. Never had Emily felt so loved before! Never before had her mom told her that she loved her!

Mrs. Chonia carefully placed her in a seat at the table in a quiet and secluded corner of the cafeteria and sat opposite her. She was now visibly crying. Emily was at a loss of what to do. Never had she seen an adult crying! She thought Mrs. Chonia was the happiest person on Earth. She felt very bad. Perhaps it was all her fault. She had made her very sad. She hesitantly put her small hand on Mrs. Chonia’s and gently squeezed it.

“I am sorry,” she said in a whisper, “I am sorry I have made you sad.”

“No…no dear.” She wiped away her tears, “it’s not your fault. I just remembered my own little girl. Her name was Cynthia. She was very beautiful, just like you.”

“What happened to her?”

“She died when she was only two,” she said, staring her in the face to see her reaction. “She got very sick from malaria and died. I miss her so!”

Emily withdrew her hand and stared at her with sad round eyes. She did not know what to say.

“But I am happy now,” she continued, smiling warmly, “do you know why?”

She shook her head. Mrs. Chonia stretched out her hand and reached for her’s. She stroked it gently. “It’s is because I have you.”

Emily felt special. She smiled back at her contentedly. They sat like that for a while, smiling at each other.

“Stay here,” Mrs. Chonia said standing up, “I will be coming soon.” She walked to the counter. Emily could help but feel good. She swung her feet and put a finger in her mouth. A few seconds later, Mrs. Chonia came back with two sumptuous cone ice creams. She gave one to Emily.

“This is mine?” she asked looking awestruck.

“Yes dear, it is all yours!”

“Thank you very much ,Mrs. Chonia,” her eyes glowed with excitement.

“You are welcome.” Mrs. Chonia could hardly eat. She found more pleasure in watching her lick at the ice cream with apparent delight on her face. In no time at all, she finished her ice cream and voraciously gulped down the cone.

“Do you want another one?” Mrs. Chonia asked, with surprise.

She shook her head and almost simultaneously, burped loudly. They burst out laughing.

“I can see that you are very full.” she said. The little girl nodded her head vigorously. Mrs. Chonia drew up her seat close to Emily’s and put her arm around her. She took in a deep breath. Emily could sense the sudden change in her disposition and she grew limp in her arm. She knew what would follow next.

“I love you very much Emily dear,” she began staring at her with such tenderness that she had never seen before. She could tell that she was not lying at all.

“I want you to be happy. I do not like seeing you sad. I want to help you, but it is all up to you. I am not going to force you. All you have to do is tell me what is bothering you. But if you don’t want to, it’s alright.”

Emily stared back at her teacher’s face, full of love. As she did so, she felt the tears coming back and spontaneously, she burst into tears and cried like a baby in her arms. She was not crying because someone hurt her or because she was upset. She was crying because someone actually cared. All this while, she had been under the impression that no one really cared about her. Now, someone actually did. She did not want this moment to end.

Mrs. Chonia did not try to stop her from crying. She knew that crying actually helps to relieve grief. Her mind slowly drifted away to her child hood days. She remembered one particular incident so clearly as if it happened yesterday. Her uncle who she had trusted so much had done the most horrible thing conceivable. He had forced himself on her. She was so confused and scared. At the same time, she felt so wretched. Though she was just a little girl of six, she knew that what had happened was wrong; very wrong. She still remembered the look on her uncle’s face and the words he had said; words that always filled her with a chill each time she remembered them.

“Don’t tell anyone about what we’ve just done,” he had said with a threatening look, “If you tell, I will kill you!” what hurt her most was that he made it seem as if she was a willing party to the crime committed. Her uncle had been visiting them for a week. The day before he left, was the day everything went wrong. Everyone had gone to attend to various duties, leaving her alone with her uncle. That was when he took advantage of her. She really believed that he would kill her if she told someone else, so she kept it to herself. The only thing she remembered telling her mom was: “I don’t want to see uncle again!”

“Why?” her mother asked.

“I just don’t like him.”

But now she really wished she had told someone. It really hurt to think that the perpetrator of that hideous crime was still out there, waiting to pounce on innocent little girls. The problem was that everyone trusted him and they would not believe it at all. They would think that she was just trying to ruin his life. Up until now, he was the last person she wanted to see. Their last meeting was particularly unpleasant. He had addressed her as his sweet niece. He probably thought she had forgotten about it. How could she? How could anyone possibly forget?

Emily gradually ceased her crying. She closed her eyes and apparently went to sleep. Mrs. Chonia sighed. It seemed she was not going to tell her anything at all. She stroked her hair with a thoughtful expression. What was going to happen now? Just how was she going to help Emily?

“Are they going to take away my brother?” Emily asked suddenly, her eyes were wide open.

Mrs. Chonia’s heart throbbed heavily.

“What do you mean dear?” she asked almost choking.

“My brother did something very bad.” She looked back at her with a look that sent chills through her whole body.

* * *

“I am sure you now understand why we have to do this.” Mrs. Chonia said as they drove away in her car to Emily’s place. She looked at her worriedly.

“I do,” she said with a look of determination.

“Good. It is for his own good.” She smiled reassuringly at her. She actually did not know how brave a girl Emily was. Indeed, it required a lot of courage to tell anyone what she had just told her.

“I love my brother very much. I did not want him to get into trouble.” She said.

“I understand dear,” she replied, but in her heart, she said, “But he is in big trouble alright.”

Upon reaching home, Emily clang on to Mrs. Chonia as they walked up to the door. She was virtually shivering.Mrs. Chonia put her arm around her to pacify her. She knocked on the door and stood back when she heard footsteps. The door swung wide open and there in the door way stood Emily’s mother with a frown on her face. She immediately softened upon seeing Mrs. Chonia.

“How are you madam?” she asked with a smile.

“I am fine thank you.”

“Is everything alright?” she asked upon seeing Emily.

“I need to have a word with you Mrs. Siluwonde,” she said, her voice slightly trembling.

“Sure, come in,” she made way for her to pass. Emily was still clinging to her teacher. Her mother eyed her suspiciously. She led Mrs. Chonia to the sitting-room and asked her to have a seat. Emily, not wanting to leave her side for a second sat next to her. Mrs. Chonia put her arm around her as she explained to her mother what she had just revealed to her.Mrs. Siluwonde threw her hand to her mouth after she finished talking. The shock on her face was very visible.

“Is it true?” she asked Emily. She nodded fearfully. She put down her arm. On her face was the angriest look Emily had ever seen on her mother’s face.

“David!” she called viciously on top of her voice. “David!”

“Ma?” David answered from somewhere inside the house.

“Come here immediately!” David stumbled into the sitting-room with surprise all over his face.He did not know why his mother could demand his presence with such a harsh tone. Upon seeing Mrs. Chonia and Emily all looking daggers at him, he suddenly had an idea where all this was heading. A sick feeling came over him. His heart throbbed wildly and his legs became wobbly.

“Have a seat young man!” his mother commanded. He walked unsteadily to one of the sofa’s and slumped himself on it. He tried to look oblivious and unaffected, but his fear and agitation soon got the better of him. He clenched his teeth to prevent them from chattering.

“Emily tells us that you did something that has made her very upset. What is it?” his mother asked.

David gave his sister a scowling look. Emily squeezed herself closer to her teacher.

“I don’t know what you are talking about,” he began defiantly.

“Don’t lie young man!” his mother yelled, “don’t forget that I can tell when you are lying!”

The revelation unnerved him completely. He stared at them fearfully like a bird in a cage. He thrust his head in his arms and broke into sobs.

“What do you have to say for yourself now?” she asked.

“I am sorry,” he said staring at Emily, his eyes red with tears. “I needed the money. I owed a friend some money. He threatened to do something bad to me if I did not pay him back. So I decided to steal some money from dad. But unfortunately, Emily saw me taking the money. I was afraid she was going to tell dad. So I threatened her. I said that if she tells dad, he would call the police and they would take me away. I told her that they would cut off my ears, hands and legs and that they would finally kill, cutting me up into so many pieces. I knew she would be too afraid to tell. I further dampened her spirits by saying that no one would believe her any way. No one would believe a little bad girl like her. I also told her that no one really likes her at all. But I was still worried that she would tell that, so I told her that I would kill her if she told anyone. All I wanted was to instill fear in her. I even started hitting her whenever I got the chance. I am so sorry…”

Emily was trying desperately to hide behind Mrs. Chonia.

“Don’t worry, he wont do anything to you,” her mother said. She gave him a terribly stern look.“I will make sure he doesn’t.”

“I had no intentions of harming her.” David said wiping away his tears.

“You already harmed her,” Mrs. Chonia retorted. “Making her feel as if she is the bad one; as if she is not worthy to be alive. Do you know what it has done to her?”

“Sorry…” was all he could say, shuddering from his sobbing.

“My son,” his mother began in a pleading tone. “How can you owe anyone five million kwacha?”

He stared from Mrs. Chonia to his mother; as if he knew what he was going to say next was going to seal his fate.

“I lost a parcel he gave me for safe keeping,” he said in a very low tone.

“What was it?” Mrs. Siluwonde asked.

“It was some drugs, some cocaine,” he said hesitantly. He could see the looks of horror on their faces. “I had no idea. You have to believe me. If I knew, I would not have…”

“I think your father needs to know about this.” his mother said, reaching out for her phone. He waved his hands frantically.

“Please, don’t tell dad…” he pleaded.

“You know very well that he has to know. You have done a very bad thing. Not only did you make little Emily suffer, but you made innocent Fred go to Jail. He has served us faithfully for ten years and during all this time, he has not taken something that does not belong to him. He has been a very faithful servant. Poor Fred… Drugs!”

She could hardly believe it. David was too enfeebled to look up. He sat with his head in his arms. He sat like that till his father arrived with the police. Mr. Siluwonde did not say anything. He just directed the police to his son while he watched on with a cold look on his face. The two police men hastily and excitedly put handcuffs on his hands and drugged him towards their van. Before he was thrown in, he took one last glance at his sister.

“I am sorry Emily,” he whispered. He was just now realizing just how much damage he had done. Mr. Siluwonde picked up his daughter and gave her a tight embrace. Together, they watched the van drive away with their David. They were going to miss him, but as Emily now had learnt, it was for his own good. His father was going to make sure he got all the help he could.

“Thank you very much Mrs. Chonia,” he said shaking her hand.

“It’s all thanks to Emily.” Mrs. Chonia said.

“Yes, my beautiful Emily,” her father proudly said, giving her a light kiss on her forehead.

“You will be alright dear,” she said holding her hand. “And your brother will be alright too. You have done the right thing.”

Emily smiled shyly.

“I will see you at school tomorrow,” Mrs. Chonia said as she got in her car. As she drove away, she felt a sense of accomplishment, as if she had done something great. But, deep in her heart she knew that it was Emily who really had done it. She too had learnt something from little Emily. Instead of driving home, she decided to visit her uncle. She had a bone to chew with him. And as for Emily, she was going to do all she could to help her grow into a proper adult, a lovely woman.

 

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